HEAL THY SELF – CAN WE LET GO OF THE OLD PAIN FOR FREEDOM?

Originally written for the New Moon Women’s Circle website

Before you can let go of anything, you need to realize you’re holding on.  “How could anyone ever love me?” “People are mean.” “No one understands me.” That’s just a few of the pieces of baggage that I’ve been carrying along with me.  I only just realized that in the midst of finding love and happiness in my life in the past years that I was still dragging those fears along with me. Why? For me, it has always been:  it’s safe, it’s familiar. I decided to drop all pretenses a few days ago when I performed and see what happened: I was fully loved, I was fully open to love and give and receive joy. It was amazing and terrifying and wonderful.  Terrifying? But you just said you got all this love and stuff? It’s not what’s familiar. It’s not what’s natural for me. So my natural inclination is to put back my defenses and hide, but I’m going to try not to. I’m working on it (my mantra for the year!).  There’s a reason why the title of this article is “can we let go” and not “how to let go.” Before you can get to the actual execution you have to be willing to try. And not just try once. But try and fail and try and fail and try again and maybe have some success and keep trying.  It’s like yoga. Letting go of what’s holding you back isn’t a quick fix. It’s a daily, hourly, moment to moment practice of accepting that you have the pain and choosing to let go of it. As I said, I’m working on it.

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